We’ve all been wounded, every single one of us. No matter how perfect, or not, our upbringing was, we’ve all been wounded. We all carry a core vulnerability. It was designed that way. It was meant to be like that. Mystery saw to it. Its a gift of the soul. The worst thing we can do is lie to ourselves.
Firstly because we keep a large part of the true meaning of our lives away form ourselves and miss the very meaning of our existence.
Secondly because when we lie to ourselves we also lie to everyone else around us. We don’t know we’re doing it for most part. Its unconscious. But this wound is beckoning for us to become conscious in every step of the way.
Our core wound triggers will keep emerging in our lives until we are ready to pay attention. There will come a certain point when we’re ready to face it head on. We’ll be ready to hold our long lost child in our arms and see where all the holes to our existence needed our love and attention.
The wound is the gateway to your soul. After some time, if you tend to her, she’ll start to show you that on the other side of her darkness are so many shiny pieces of gold that if you took them to the bank you’d be a millionaire. She’s been caked in tar, black soot, hidden even from herself for quite some time now but as you start to nurture her, she starts to loose her darkness. You’ll start to see, as you peel back the layers, that her power is in the very thing you feared. The others feared them too, long before you were aware of your gift, thats why they got shut down in the first place, because you were too powerful for them.
When you wake up from the too small story to the true magnitude of your soul, it’s like the sun rising at dawn. From the darkness of night the sun begins to shine again and you can see more clearly the world around you. Not that it was “bad” in the dark, she, your soul, just isn't meant to stay hidden, she doesn’t like to be boxed in. She’s been trying to get your attention all this time so she can come out.
She might not be ready to come out into the light yet. You might have to give her some time, tending to her in the secret of the dark. She feels safe there for now and because this is your deepest vulnerability she’ll want to know that you can hold her properly before she come out onto the stage. She’ll want to know that you can fend of the demons that will be waiting for her when she does come out. She’ll want to know that you’re strong enough that they wont even be able to come close. Then she’ll come out.
She might not feel that strong at first. But there comes a time when the only way through, is through. She might come charging like a bull in a china shop after a life time of being held back or she might come in whispers that promise to turn to a lions roar. She might not know how to come but she will find a way through the cracks. Something will start to take shape, Mystery will see it. After some fumbling time, like the steps of new born child, she’ll start to grow wings of faith, mainly in herself. And in you, because now you see her for who she truly is. For the truth of her calling, not for the smallness she was shaped into, for safe keeping.
Together you’ll have to start to find new ways to bring the essence of her to the world, in your relationships. It might be messy at first. It will most definitely be some of the bravest acts of courage you would have committed up until now. They will be some of the biggest risks you’ll ever have to make. You might fall, make a mess, give yourself permission to do so. They are part of the learning. Before you know it you’ll start to carve your art by your very act of being. People will feel it just by being around you. And then after sometime she will start to soar like a Golden Eagle. That will be the day that what was seen as your weakness, becomes your greatest strength.